So … have you ever met a man and been so swept off your feet instantly and under such a spell that you were definitely convinced he was MR RIGHT??
I can’t imagine that any ladies out there wont relate to that question … But when did you wake up and realize it was a nightmare not a dream?
Now I am no spring chicken here ladies and I have been out with a few cheeky and charming fella’s in my time, 4 of those men I was in a long term relationship with but I was definitely convinced more so than ever before in my last relationship that he was MR RIGHT!
You may be asking yourself WHY?? Well I guess you could say there were a number of different reasons.
It all began when I had finally decided that after 13 years of living and travelling abroad that I had made a decision (and bad assumption) in my head that I HAD to move back to Perth, settle down and that I would not find my MR RIGHT unless I was living back in my home town … mmmmm interesting thought process right??
Yep so that’s exactly what I did, I packed all my stuff up in Sydney and moved back to Perth 5 years ago and tried to settle back into the place I grew up. I was trying to conform to all these rules and regulations in life because that’s the assumption I had made remember that I had to be in Perth to find the right man. And what do you know about a year after my “Mr Right” found me. Yes that’s right I had finally met my MR RIGHT. The puzzle had come together! I was ecstatic.
He was ever so charming, got along with my family really well, we had the same background, sister’s I got along with very well, he sold me the DREAM, he talked about marriage within the first few months and what kind of ring I wanted, he sent me all these beautiful text messages, told me he LOVED me so soon, and the list goes on and on.
Did I have doubts? Yes I sure did but I didn’t want to explore that as I has finally meet “MR RIGHT” therefore I do what most women do and ignored all the big alarm bells and RED signals, and continued to be swept off my feet. Can anyone else relate to this?
Now I am no fool to think that relationships are all smooth sailing and perfect and all fluffy, but I am pretty sure when you start seeing some cracks and having some pretty serious issues within the first 8 weeks it may be time to have a little check in or should I say chat with yourself.
So I ask myself again.
- Why did I ignore all the signs?
- Why did I allow myself to put him on a pedestal?
- Why did I continue to stay after there were signs of emotional abuse?
- Why was he saying his EX was crazy?
- Why won’t he just sort himself out?
I gave him 100% , but what did I give myself? I lost myself and that was the biggest mistake that I could make in that relationship. Now I am definitely not perfect and I made many mistakes too, but what I do know is that I did things out of the kindness and compassion of my heart, and mostly for the love of another human being, but where did it get me I ask myself again? Broken.. But only to re-build myself better than EVER!! If it wasn’t for that experience I would not be where I am today.
Was he my MR RIGHT? No he definitely wasn’t. But this breakup was different to any I had ever experienced before and it took me a long to put all the pieces of the puzzle together. I will share this with you over the coming weeks.
Ask yourself these questions.
- Have you lost yourself in your relationship?
- Have you been giving and giving and not getting anything back?
- Are you being hooked on just his charm?
- Are you in an toxic or unhealthy relationship?
- Are there any alarm bells that you are ignoring already?
KO is OK xx